My name is Adele and I’m 26. My husband Dan and I have been together for 7 years and married for over 3. He is my best friend, my confidant, and overall, a pretty amazing guy. Sometimes things in life just work out exactly how they are supposed to- I found the perfect guy, we fell in love, and had our (my!?!) dream wedding with a church, a big white dress and surrounded by friends and family. We fall further into love each and every day- well, except when he smells like pitas when he crawls into bed… but more on that later!
I completed 6 years of post secondary school and came out with a BA, BEd, and an MA. Again, I hit the jackpot. After a lot of hard work, long commutes to Toronto (make that 2 hours each direction), and education… I got my dream job: a Labour Relations Officer for the Nurses’ Union. I spend my days working to represent our members who need assistance for various matters related to their employment. It’s long hours, and a lot of work, but I’m exactly where I am want to be!
Dan followed his love of music to school in London, ON to achieve a diploma in Audio Engineering and has been working at a high-end electronics store installing custom home theatres. In July 2013, after almost a year of planning and hard work, he has opened a franchise restaurant called Pita Pit.
This is the story of us trying to create a family. I have put countless hours into deciding if and how I would write this. Do I explain the fertility treatments in detail? Do I rationalize all of our impossible decisions? And most importantly, do I open up the most intimate details of our lives for anyone to read?
The answer to all of the above questions is yes. Yes, I intend on explaining every little step & detail to the last 1.5 years of our life. I’m not writing this to get pity or sympathy. In fact, my rationale is quite the opposite. I hope for two things:
1) Share knowledge: Infertility is something I knew nothing about until I was made an unfortunate member of that club no one wants to join. The more I open up about the process, the more I hear people saying “really?”, “I had no idea!”, or “OHIP covers nothing?”. So I hope that for those who have no knowledge about this process, this will assist in explaining at least a small piece of it. Remember, this is simply one story of one couple. However, I hope it will help to start a conversation about an all too common medical condition that affects every aspect of your life- infertility.
2) Know that you’re not alone: Perhaps the larger reason behind sharing our story is to help others who are going through the same journey. A 2012 study showed that 1 in 6 people in Canada between the ages of 18-44 years of age are experiencing infertility. One person in six! What that means is that chances are, among even your closest friends and relatives, that infertility is rearing it’s very ugly head. Saying you can’t conceive isn’t exactly a Facebook status. For some reason, infertility is a taboo topic that is not discussed. Yet the above study assures me that others that I know are experiencing the same struggles. For me, the one thing that helped get through these long, and often lonely months, was speaking to others going through similar treatments. The simple act of sharing made me feel that there was hope. I hope that sharing this story can at least let someone out there know- you’re not alone.
Here is your warning. I am writing it all.
So for those of you who think hearing about sperm samples, uterine thickness, transvaginal ultrasounds and suppositories may make you gag- that’s ok- but then this ain’t for you!
 Kirky, Sharon. The National Post. “Infertility on the Rise in Canada”. 02/15/12. http://news.nationalpost.com/2012/02/15/infertility-on-the-rise-in-canada-study/